


One by One

by MrKrabs



Category: Xena: Warrior Princess
Genre: Fluff and Angst, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Love, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 12:32:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17447069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MrKrabs/pseuds/MrKrabs
Summary: Xena must dig deep inside herself to forgive Gabrielle for the loss of her son. (One shot)





	One by One

**Author's Note:**

> Dedicated to the person that encouraged me to write better! 
> 
> I hope you all enjoy!

Xena woke with a jerk, straightway taking in her surroundings. As a skilled warrior, she was always keenly aware of what was going on around her, making sure she was three steps ahead of everything in order to survive. She was in her undergarments, body covered in dirt, wrists and ankles bloodied and bound in shackles, along with a chain around her waist.

 

A foul smell filled the air.

 

_Where am I?_

 

She concluded she must be in a cave, but as to the location, she wasn’t certain. She couldn’t work out how she ended up in this dark and unfamiliar place. The last thing she remembered was Gabrielle and…

 

_Solan_

 

Gabrielle was the reason her only son was dead.

 

“IF YOU HAD JUST DONE WHAT YOU WERE TOLD!” shouting into the void, Xena dropped to her knees and gnawed at her chains like a deranged mad woman left to rot in a cell.

 

She lifted her eyes in the direction of what looked like the only entrance in this cave. A tiny ball of light shone through, illuminating a fraction of the area. She looked for a way to climb, but saw no vines or stones in the wall to use as leverage.

 

“ _Think_ Xena” she said out loud as she began to pace in frustration. “Who would have the power to put me here? And _where_ is _here?_ ” She stopped in her tracks. She knew Gabrielle was the last person she saw. In fact, she was in the middle of successfully carrying out her vengeance on the little blonde.

 

“That could only mean one thing” she smirked, believing to have figured out the mystery. “ARES!” the warrior princess yelled out, followed by a chilling cackle. “I’ll admit, you’ve outdone yourself this time!” she scratched her head furiously like a dog with fleas. “Let’s negotiate, shall we? I promise I won’t rip your head off!” there was a glint in her eye, the kind that was only there when Xena wasn’t telling the whole truth. 

 

But there was no answer from the God of War. Not a soul was around.

 

She sighed and dropped to her knees.

 _Gabrielle._ Thoughts of her early encounter with the bard momentary pulled her into a false sense of security.

_“Now I know you don’t know me-I’m new in town- but I can assure you, Xena is a changed woman.” Xena watched a pipsqueak of a girl try and talk sense into a bar full of angry people._

_She listened as the blonde spewed some story about Xena being the warlord, Draco’s girlfriend. “Alright, but get Xena out of here right now.”_

 

“I’ll never understand why you did it. But against all odds, you’ve stuck by my side, haven’t you, kid?”

_“You’re not just going to leave me here, are you? I came all this way to see you!” the teen looked up at the woman on a golden horse whom she later came to know as Argo._

_“That is your problem.”_

_“Hey I just saved your life!” she wagged her finger up at her, recalling a few moments ago when she saved the leather clad woman from the angry mob of Amphipolis. The warrior thought for a few seconds before taking pity on the girl who didn’t want to go back to her hometown, then offering her arm in support so she could climb behind her._

 

“I didn’t know then how much you’d come to mean to me Gabrielle. You became my _home._ But like everyone else, you’ve abandoned me!” She opened her arms wide as if to present an empty room. “Where are you now?” she whispered to herself.

 

“You, me, Solan, we could have been happy!” Nothing but an echo to answer back.

 

Xena rose to her feet and made and attempted run into the darkness. _I’ll climb my way out._

 

She jumped a great distance between the ground and the wall before there was an abrupt yanking of the chain around her waist. A spasm of pain contorted her face. _Sharp rocks._ Her vision became tunneled as she rolled onto her side, struggling to breathe through constricted lungs. _I’m going to die_ she thought.

Regaining her breath, panic settled in the pit of her stomach as she was suddenly aware that she was no longer in control of her own body. It was like watching herself in a dream within herself. She stood upright and ran in the opposite direction of her chains.

 

“There must be a way out.” she whispered to herself. Once again the feeling of her body being taken over by some unknown force settled in. Clenching her fists so tight that her knuckles turned white. “Calm yourself, Xena.” she said, willing herself to gain control, but to no avail.

 

Her bloody feet led her down a desolate tunnel. The further she went, the colder she became and the stench of the air filled her nostrils.

 

Kneeling down, Xena looked on in horror as she found herself parting the lips of her enemy, Callisto. Remorse overtook her. _“You made me, Xena.”_

 

“Stop!” she yelled out in fear of being confronted by her past, but the harder she fought it the stronger the urge to continue, grew.

 

 

“You have to get up so we can get out of here! It’s the only way!” she crawled to the side of her enemy, reluctantly resuscitating another.

 

“Gabrielle” lying next to Callisto, was the source of Xena’s love and her new found hatred. Her best friend turned enemy. “Y-you killed My son!” She cried out in desperation. “Wake up!” She beat down on the dead bard’s chest before breathing air into her mouth.

 

 

Xena looked beyond the the two rotting bodies and found the that of Borias. _Resuscitate._ Lyceus. _Resuscitate._ Julius Caesar. _Resuscitate_. Her mother, Cyrene. _Resuscitate._ With tears falling from her eyes and death on her lips, she gazed upon mounds of bodies. Those she had ruthlessly killed in battle, and of those she knew to be alive. She begged it to stop.

 

“Why is this happening?!” she cried out before running to another. A boy she killed over 10 years ago. “Wake up!” came the broken cry. Climbing over his body, she looked on in shock, reaching the body of her former mentor.

 

“You have to get up!” the warrior could only look on.

 

 _“Xena”_ came the voice of Lao Ma, though not from her lips. It seemed to be all around her.

 

The warrior paused in perplexity of hearing her mentor’s voice. She whipped her head around from left to right to find the source.

 

“Xena, to control others is to have power, to control yourself is to know the way.”

 

“How am I supposed to do that when I can’t even control my own limbs!” She bit back.

 

“Fill yourself with desire and see only illusion. Empty yourself of desire and understand the great mystery of things.”

 

Xena was becoming increasingly impatient.

 

“You always liked riddles. Why am I here? What is this place?”

 

“Your guilt is your desire, therefore, you see illusion.”

 

“Yeah? What a load of crock!” Xena was unyielding. _You don’t know anything about me._ She scoffed.

 

“Ask yourself, what do you hope to accomplish by sentencing yourself to a lifetime of penitence? ”

 

“To pay back to the dead what I’ve taken from them!”

 

“This is an impossible task. Do not pity the dead, Xena, pity the living, and, above all, pity those who live without love.”

 

“Then why is Gabrielle here, why is my mother here, and those who I haven’t touched with even the hilt of my sword?” Xena pleaded to know more of what was happening to her and why her loved ones appeared in the same place as those she knew to be dead.

 

“These are the ones that have hurt you. They represent the hate and anger you carry within your heart. Everytime you dwell on these feelings and the wrong actions of others against you, you’re breathing life into them, giving them a power over you. The chains are the link. The past is the past.”  


Xena stopped running from body to body and looked up once again, to the small light shining down. She contemplated Lao Ma’s words. “How could she let go of the guilt of her past and the anger of the present?

 

“Are you ready to be free, Xena?”

 

“If I let go, the ones who did me wrong will get away with it! Gabrielle will get away with the murder of my son! Doesn’t that mean anything?”

 

“No one truly gets away with anything, Xena. Empty yourself of guilt and hate once and for all. You will understand that those whose lives you took, have forgiven. And those who stole from you, you must forgive also. It is the only way.”

 

The warrior looked around one last time at all the bodies and saw him.

 

_Solan._

The guilt of her own son and the fact that she never told him who she really was, weighed heavy on her heart. But she was tired and knew that if she didn’t let go, her guilt would be her burden to carry forever. After everything she just witnessed, she knew she didn’t want to hold onto it any longer.

 

“I’m ready..” she said, barely above a whisper. _Clink, clink._ Her chains fell to the ground.

 

The light in the cave opened wider until only blue sky remained. Xena was being lifted upward by an invisible force, and she felt like warm honey was being poured over her from the top of her head to the soles of her feet. Slowly, she was being transformed from her dirty appearance.

 

“I’m so glad you let go, Xena.”

 

“Lao Ma” she ran to her once her toes touched the grassy plain, tackling her to the ground in excitement. Happiness filled her heart and she smiled from ear to ear at the sight of the woman she has so longed to see again.

 

Her former mentor laughed, looking down at her warrior princess.

 

In one swift blow of the wind, she disappeared from Xena’s hold.

 

Xena however, was not sad. She felt a peace that she had never felt before, like all of her sins and offenses were washed away.

 

She closed her eyes, and when she opened them, she was greeted by a concerned Gabrielle.

“Xena, Xena!” Gabrielle enveloped the dark haired woman in her arms. They appeared to be in an amazon hut, where Xena last found the bard before dragging her to the cliffside. None of that mattered now.

 

All that mattered was the immense weight that Xena felt had been lifted, and the love that remained in her heart for her friend.

 

“I thought I had lost you and-” the blonde squeezed her tighter as if the warrior would disappear.

 

“No Gabrielle, I’m home.” she smiled, completely content.


End file.
